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March 29th, 2008
07:03 pm
I have now seen a few minutes of South Park. In Gaelic.
This is some sort of major milestone, but I'm not sure what kind.
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March 10th, 2008
07:30 pm - Incongruity
Spotted a few minutes ago in the Safeway parking lot: full-sized four-wheel-drive pickup truck. Fog lights, double rear wheels, flames painted on the hood. The window was rolled down, and the music from inside was booming across the parking lot.
The occupant was listening to Leonard Cohen's "Closing Time".
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December 4th, 2007
01:39 pm - See, there's bad movies...
...and then there's bad movies.
When I was a kid, I loved movie trailers and movie reviews. They made me feel like I knew what was going on, even if I never saw the movies in question (and I usually didn't).
Possibly as a result of this, I had enough critical sense at age 12 to recognize a really honkingly awful movie premise when I heard one. And when I saw a TV ad for this, it was obvious to me that I was in the presence of something truly spectacular -- not in the 'Lawrence of Arabia' sense, but in the 'Stop making a spectacle of yourself!' sense. Or maybe in the 'I'm going to smash my spectacles so I can stop watching this' sense. And, in retrospect, I thought maybe I'd exaggerated it in retrospect -- because there was no way in hell anyone spent real money on a premise that stupid, right?
Thanks to YouTube and Wikipedia, I can now confirm that this movie did, in fact, exist. Here, take a gander at the trailer. I'll wait.
http://youtube.com/watch?v=9Mkl9rtttog
Yes, that is really a martial arts movie about gymnastics. And yes, what you glimpsed a few seconds of in the trailer was indeed a fight scene involving a pommel horse[*]:
http://youtube.com/watch?v=-gTkUcXGF_Q
Maybe it would have been better if I'd hallucinated the whole thing when I was 12.
[*] I'd say that was a real pommel-horse pummelling, but I have far too much pride to make a joke that bad. Honest.
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November 12th, 2007
03:15 pm
Yesterday I went running for the first time in months.
I kind of felt like this guy.
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August 14th, 2007
10:48 pm
If you're washing out an ice-cube tray, I really recommend against turning the tap on full-blast and then placing the tray directly into the stream. Unless you have an audience[*].
Don't ask me how I know this.
* * *
I'm off road-tripping tomorrow, with the inimitable ![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif) parergon. Time to find me some mountains. Here's to me remembering to water my plants in the morning.
* * *
And, just for the record, my life recently got about six million times more awesome[**]. All is well in zrblmistan tonight.
- - -
[*] A vaudeville/slapstick audience, not a symphony-orchestra audience.
[**] (actually 5,987,102 times more awesome, but there's no need to be overly pedantic).
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June 19th, 2007
10:16 pm - Flash flash kaboom
For those of you who hadn't noticed, the prairies do thunderstorms like nobody's business.
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June 6th, 2007
03:34 pm
So that's where you go to buy burlap boxer shorts...
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April 17th, 2007
01:19 am - Um.
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April 12th, 2007
April 11th, 2007
08:14 pm
Are those Coles Notes in your pants, or are you just happy to see me?
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March 25th, 2007
08:50 pm - Culinary observation du jour
Mole and satay are surprisingly similar.
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January 25th, 2007
January 18th, 2007
January 12th, 2007
January 7th, 2007
06:59 pm - Phrases I'd prefer not to appear in my obituary
- "Witnesses at the scene reportedly 'couldn't stop laughing'."
- "Forensic tests are being performed on the goat."
- "A police spokesman emphasized that chainsaw-juggling should be left to the professionals."
- "...largest intestinal parasite ever recorded..."
- "...species of poisonous spider never before seen in Manitoba."
- "Video of the episode will be featured in a special on Fox Television."
- "...body was partially dissolved..."
- "Authorities have so far been unable to gain access to the gorilla cage."
- "...a 'significant level' of residual radiation..."
- "...2007."
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January 1st, 2007
12:35 pm
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November 19th, 2006
09:26 pm - Just for the record
C'mon, you know it's true.
Fuckin' Grey Cup.
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September 12th, 2006
September 9th, 2006
April 2nd, 2006
01:06 am - Manifesto
At least once in my life, I need to put a slinky on an escalator.
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